Autism & Birthday Parties

 
   My autistic son Caleb is in grade 4, he's 9 years old. He got invited to his first ever school friend birthday party in December. 
 
   One of my daughters is in Kindergarten, she's 5 years old. She been invited to 3 birthday parties already. 
   
​   Growing up, kids get invited to cousins parties, and parties of the kids who their parents are friends with. Then school starts, and there is a shift, and usually, kids start getting invited to friends at school parties.

   
   We knew that things wouldn't be normal for Caleb regarding school and friends, but somehow, seeing his sister getting so many invites red-flagged us to the fact that probably every other kid in his class was being invited to something, except him. 
   
   I completely understand why a parent might have reservations about inviting a special needs child to their home for a party. Who would want to willingly have someone over for a birthday party who doesn't communicate that well all the time, who might get overly excited, who can be unpredictable? 
   
    When the invitation showed up in his backpack in December, I literally starting crying. I called Caleb over and told him what I was reading, and asked him if he wanted to go to this birthday (for a boy who he has really loved since he started at that school in grade 1), he jumped strait up in the air and shouted, "yippee!". Not exactly a "yes", but I think his answer was better.
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    I have no pictures of the party because Caleb walked there after school with the other boys going to the party, and my friend picked him up and brought him home for me. He did it all on his own (basically), and the only worrisome thing told to me was that he started getting really worked up by the end. Let's see: boys+sugar+party=worked up. I think that's pretty normal? 
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   Do I think my Caleb is amazing for making his first birthday party invite a success (and not having a meltdown!)-yes I do! But who I really think is amazing is the boy who invited him. 
   
    It was a brave, and truly unselfish move to invite Caleb to his party. If that was Caleb's only party he ever gets invited to, you can be sure he will remember it, and remember who invited him, and how wonderful that young  man is.  
   
   Caleb wants to be included, he wants to fit in. He wants to play with his friends, and go to birthday parties. I wish people weren't so afraid of him, and the unknown aspects of him. 
     
    He is a sweet & funny guy, who loves animals, watching movies, colouring and drawing, eating junk food, and salad with an insane amount of italian dressing! Singing, dancing, dill popcorn seasoning added to many things (potatoes, fries, corn on the cob, even chicken drumsticks!), sitting on the heat vent in the kitchen to make his feet warm, clicking his reading lamp off and on twice before going to sleep for the night, and getting "squishes" (a seriously great hug!), and he loves singing, especially "happy birthday". 
   
​     I wish more people could really get to know him, not be so afraid of him, and include him more often.