If you read my blog regularly you know that I am a strong believer in getting to know autism. Reading books and articles, watching movies and t.v. specials, and meeting people with autism all help to inform us (the non-autistics) about the world of autism.
   So far this summer I have met quite a few new people with autism and their parents and I was struck with a thought-does a parent having any previous knowledge or experience effect their child with autism, whether it be positive or negative?
   This post may seem judgemental because I don't know exactly whats going on in each of the families lives in these stories, but they are just observational thoughts on the time I spent with each family (in bigger group settings). We have, and have had, many struggles with Caleb, and I know we get judged on the things we do. 
   This post is meant to be educational. These experiences were educational for me, and I wanted to pass them on.

   I met one family who were undereducated about autism, and clearly overwhelmed by it. They called their son "retarded" in front of a group of strangers gathered for a BBQ, and made a big song and dance out of the problems they were having with their child. 
   I get being overwhelmed, I get not always knowing what to do and how to cope (especially at large gatherings that can overwhelm a child with autism), but I also know that if those parents educated themselves a little about autism they might realize that their son has potential, isn't a lost cause, isn't just a ball and chain around their necks.
   This young boy kept "stealing" cookies from the kitchen. He is 8 years old, that's pretty much a standard behaviour at that age, autism or not! He wasn't asking though, so it is poor manners. 
   As a means of dealing with this problem, the parents would semi-shout at the boy, "you can't take food that isn't yours!". But, we were at a bbq where food was out to be eaten, so it was technically his, and everyone else's.
   I was watching the scene unfold, so I just went into the kitchen and moved the cookies out of sight. A few minutes later this boy came wandering into the kitchen and was clearly irritated that the cookies were gone.
   I said, "are you looking for the cookies?" Up until this point I hadn't heard him say a word, and he was acting quite "handicapped" (stomping around, walking awkwardly, ignoring his parents and siblings talking to him {or about him|) so I didn't know what to expect. All I knew was that (besides "acting handicapped") he seemed capable and bright. I asked again, "are you looking for the cookies?". He didn't look at me, but he answered with a gruff, "looking for the cookies" (echoing in autism is a good thing, it means the person is hearing your words and can basically understand them, but lacks the verbal skills to come up with an answer). I said, "oh, I put them away, would you like one?". He said, "would you like one", so I prompted, "yes please?", which he echoed, "yes please". 
   I got him a cookie and held it out, waiting for a show of manners. I didn't know if he actually had any (had been taught), but most kids know they should use manners because they hear other kids being prompted to do it. So, I held it out and he went to grab for it, and I said, "what do you say?", and he said, "what do you say?". I repeated, "what do you say?". He looked me in the eye and said, "thank-you". 
   This whole episode took just a minute or two, and his parents didn't even see it. I also didn't tell them about it. I was torn between wanting them to know their "retarded" son was quite capable, and knowing that as a parent of autism myself, I don't always appreciate when someone thinks they have figured out my child and has "fixed him" for me. 
   So, I let it be, and I just keep praying for that young man and his family. 
   For lack of education about autism, he may grow up (actually, I feel certain he will grow up) as the "retarded" member of that family, and he's gonna ride that train as far as it goes. When he looked me in the eye and said, "thank-you", I knew he was playing a pretty serious hand of handicapped cards, and that he was functioning below his true potential. 

   Another family I met was a very well educated mother and father, and they had 3 kids, including one middle child with autism.
   Their son was younger than Caleb, but I was watching him and was struck by how similar Caleb had been at that age. Full of energy, full of trouble, but full of potential. 
   The Mom in this family had been trained as an early childhood educator, and as an Educational Assistant. So, she knew autism. But what became apparent was that she knew the literature on autism, the symptoms, the typical way a child would be handled with autism. What she didm't seem to know was her son. 
   I watched as she hovered over him the whole time (which I completely understand as Caleb was a run-away-er for years), but she would, "don't touch that", "don't do that", "they don't like that", and telling people as she went, "sorry, he has autism" (it always bothers me when a parent {and I'm guilty of it too!| apologizes for the autism, and not just the behaviour). 
   Anything she would ask him to do, "pick that up, please", "sit down, please", etc., he would not do. She would sometimes repeat herself, but mostly, she would just let him not listen, and wandered away with him. 
   The child seemed able to do all of the things she was asking, perhaps she needed to say it a few more times in case his audio processing was slow, but he seemed capable. Instead, he would not do what he was told, and she would let him. He was getting away with things his siblings weren't allowed to, all because he had autism. Her understanding of discipline for a child with autism was very much what she had been taught for disciplining a child with special needs in a school.  
   Her and her husband didn't treat their son like he was incapable, but they seemed to not be able to get out of book knowledge and raise a human being who was respectful and obedient. They were telling their other children things, and was clearly expecting those children to do what they were being told. But their child with autism was being asked a lot of things, "would you like to eat those veggies on your plate?", and the child would stand up and walk away, with Mother going after him, "sit down please!", he wouldn't, and off they'd wander. One of the siblings said, "I think I'm full", and the Dad says, "you need to finish your vegetables first", so the child sat and finished. There was a clear boundary between the "regular kids", and the child with autism.
   This family was well off, was from a bigger city and therefore (presumably) had some good resources for their son, and the Mom "knew all about" autism. But they were struggling with turning this child, who did need their undivided attention and support, into a person who could listen to his parents (which can translate into being a good listener to teachers, employers, etc.) and become his very best.

   Another family we met had a teenage boy with autism. 
   Both Adam and I stood talking with the teens' Mom, who was very town to earth, full of questions about Caleb, his life, his education, but also had lots of good things to share. 
   We first realized her son had autism because we saw our Caleb going on a rambling rant to their son (who just seemed awkward and loud, which we chalked up to normal teenager behaviour!). Our Caleb has started "play talking" lately. Basically, he hears adults and children talking and talking (in a normal conversation), but, despite having a great vocabulary now, he still can't quite put together a lot of thoughts together at once. So, he has started "rambling". Literally rattling on and on about something (or sometimes many obscure subjects smooshed together) but talking really fast so you can't catch anything but every 10th word. 
   So, Adam went to get Caleb and said to the young man, sorry if he's been talking your ear off. He likes to talk, but you can't always understand what he's saying. He has autism", to which the young man replied, "I have autism! Ouch!".
   Watching him and his parents was a great experience. His parents were "typical" parents of autism. They didn't know what it was until they had a child with it. But then they got him into programs, read books and articles, watched movies and specials. The Mom commits her saturdays to helping her son work through his homework, and they let him be (he did have a lot of cousins at this particular function, so they knew him), but they also expected from him what they were asking of their other children. 
   When this young  man would speak to you, he would gently take your arm, and make you turn and look at him (which is a funny turn-around because generally people with autism don't like eye contact), and when we asked his Mom later if she worked with him to do that, she said, "We did at first, but hen I read the book, "Look Me In The Eye?". Ever read it?"
   I had read it, and knew exactly what idea she was referencing: the author had talked about being a child with autism, and how if he was told to look someone in the eye, his hearing would shut off, he couldn't use or process any words, and his sense of touch was over-sensitive. Basically, if he looked at you, that's all he was doing. Looking at you. If you wanted him to hear what you needed to say, you needed to let him look away, sometimes even shutting his eyes to really be able to let his ears hear and process.
    We were refreshed with their approach to raising their son with autism. He was challenging (as she shared with us), but they always expected a lot from their son, and he delivered. What we met was a 15 year old boy who clearly had special needs, but who was happy. He kept coming over and hugging his Mom (as Caleb was also doing to me).
   At one point when he came over, he made me look at him and said to me, "your daughter with the yellow curly hair called me a stinker butt". I said, "oh dear, well, she is full of sass. Was she joking, or was she being mean? Did it hurt your feelings?". He said, "Well, I think she was joking, and my feelings are not hurt, but I wanted you to know". I said, "O.k, I will talk to her about it, thanks". "You're welcome", he said, and walked away. His Mom just smiled at me, and I said, "he seems great", and she said he was.
   These parents were just "typical" parents until this son came along, but they took it in stride, they learned what they could, but they also got to know their son, and set up boundaries and rules to help him become well adjusted and functional in society. 
   They had set up an example of how to treat their son for the siblings to see, and his sisters treated him with respect, and with a lot of love. They clearly thought he was great, and loved him.  

   So, education, per se, makes a big difference in raising a child with autism, but what else makes a child with autism become all they were meant to be?
   Support for one. Support from the parents, the siblings, the programs the child may be in. School, church, playgroups. Wherever the child goes, support needs to be there. And I'm not necessarily talking about support like knowing what to do with a child with autism. I'm talking about support like someone who believes the child can become a great many things, can excel, can learn and is smart. Support for the child as a person, not as a special need. 
   I also strongly believe that getting to know textbook autism is a big thing. It's sounds obvious, but that first family I talked about seemed happy with "retarded", and were fairly unfamiliar with typical autism stuff (like echoing, which as I mentioned, is not a "bad behaviour", it's an important learning tool).
   The third thing is getting to know your child, autism aside. The second family knew autism inside and out, but couldn't seem to get to know their son and treat him as a member of their family instead of just a person with a special need.
   All of these families, and my own family, are different in a lot of ways. The kids are different, our daily family life looks different, the siblings and family support are different. But we've all got a common denominator, which is autism. 
   Education is key, it's paramount, but it looks like a lot of different things. Educating yourself about autism has many sides, but the end results should be the same: that people with autism are getting treated right. With dignity and respect, with love and compassion, and with the knowledge that they are just people. Special people, but people none-the-less. 

   Back in the day, when I was a young lass, the only Chinese food I had ever had was buffet style. The idea of ordering one thing seemed absurd....until I met the China King (drool....). 
   The China King is a restaurant in Brantford, and it was my first taste of Chinese food not from a buffet. I was living in Brantford, and went there with my eldest sister and her family. I literally had no idea what to get because I had never bothered to know what anything was called at any buffet I had ever been to. I just took what looked yummy! Duh. 
   So, my sister assured me that I would be pleased with the moo-shu chicken, and so I ordered it.....and my life was forever changed! Haha, o.k, that may be a little dramatic....but it's pretty close to how it all went down.
   Moo-shu chicken (or beef, or shrimp, or pork, or just plain old moo-shu vegetables) is traditionally sliced or shredded meat, scrambled egg, stir fried in sesame or peanut oil, with thinly sliced vegetables (mushroom, bamboo shoots, and day-lily buds are the common Chinese veggies used). Generally in Canada, the veggies are thinly sliced cabbage,  carrots, and mushrooms (not always, but generally). China King serves their moo-shu with a thin wrap (to make it into a burrito-type thing), and a sauce that I literally have no idea what it is......but it's good! 
   Well, it's been years since I had China King's moo-shu, but I hadn't forgotten it! I had some ground turkey thawing out, but I didn't want to make what I had planned. So, I started to cook it up, and had a thought....could I make moo-shu with pre-packaged cole-slaw mix? It seemed like that was possible, and since I make the meals around this joint, I could give it a try! 
   This paleo moo-shu turkey is (obviously) not exactly like The China King (I didn't make a mysterious sauce for it....), but I really loved it! 

Super Simple Paleo Moo-Shu Turkey

Ingredients:

• 1 Tbsp olive oil
• 2 Eggs
• 1 lb Ground turkey (or any round meat)
• 1 Large onion, diced
• 3 Cloves garlic, crushed and diced.
• 2 Tablespoon fresh grated ginger, or 2 teaspoons dried
• 1 Bag cole slaw mix
  
• 1 Tbsp Frank's Original Hot Sauce
• 1 Tsp Lemon juice
  
• 1 Tbsp pure sesame oil

Method:

1. Heat a large frying pan to medium
2. Add oil when the pan is hot, and crack the eggs into the pan, and quickly move them around as they cook, so you have a very thin scrambled egg.
3. Now add the ground meat. Cook and brown the meat, breaking up big chunks with a wooden spoon as you go.
4. Once the meat is fully cooked, add the onion and garlic, and allow them to cook and become soft and fragrant. 
5. Turn the heat up on the pan (just to medium-high) and add the bag of coleslaw mix, as well as the ginger, Frank's and lemon juice. Stir occasionally as the cabbage mix wilts slightly, and picks up the flavours of the meat and spices.
6. Once the cabbage mix is tender-crisp (this will only take a few minutes), remove from heat, and add the sesame oil and stir everything up to get the beautiful sesame flavour throughout the moo-shu.
7. Serve as is, or in a lettuce wrap. Or if you're not a paleo eater, serve with rice, and soy sauce, or in a small burrito or rice paper wrap. 

   Well, that's it. It's honestly so simple to pull together! You could make it more full of veggies by adding sliced mushrooms, bean sprouts, bok choy, peppers anything you might add to a regular asian stir-fry, really.
   So much love to all you good Wednesday people.  :)  

   Well, I'm back. Not from any special holiday or anything, but we last minute decided to go visit family this past Monday, and I thought I would take a week off from my blogging obsession. It was strange, and difficult to be honest! I've grown accustomed to waking up early, having my cup-o'-coffee, and working away at the blog. I felt a smidge lost not doing it, but I survived! 
   Anywhoooo.....this summer has not been that hot, but I still like to use the BBQ as much as possible. Making grilled cheese is a favourite, and I would rather BBQ it than have pans to wash any day!   

BBQ'd Grilled Cheese

Ingredients:

• 4 slices of bread (for 2 sandwiches)
  
• Butter
  
• Shredded cheese (a nice sharp kind is delightful)
• Extras (optional): cooked bacon, sliced lunch meats, sliced roasted chicken, onion, tomato, avocado-the possibilities are endless! Check these out!  

Method:

1. Preheat grill on medium-ish until hot.
   
2. Lay out all your bread on a large cutting board or plate, and butter each piece (picture 1 below). Be sure to butter all the way out to the edge so that it all gets crispy. Then put two pieces butter side together.
3. Sprinkle some cheese onto the bread (which should be facing you, non-buttered side up like picture 2).
4. Add any extras you plan to use, then sprinkle some more cheese on top of that.
5. Clean the hot grill grates really well. Get all the carbon off the surface by using a good brush or scraper. If you haven't got a scraper, wad up some aluminum foil and scrub the grates. 
6. Carefully take the top piece of bread (the one with everything on it), and place it on the grill. Then take the second piece of bread from that sandwich, and place it on top of it's partner on the grill, butter side up.
7. Close the lid, but don't go a'wandrin'! Give them about 2 minutes before you take a look at the bottoms. You want the bread a nice colour before you flip it. 
8. Flip and grill the other side. If the bread is toasty, but the cheese isn't sufficiently melted, place a piece of tin foil on it, turn the BBQ off and close the lid for a minute or two until it's melted.
   
9. Remove from BBQ, slice, and serve! 

   Well, that's it for today!!! I hope everyone has a great day! It's raining here, but I'm not too worried. My gardens will be happy, and the kids and I can have some indoor fun/lazy p.j. day! 

   We have a wonderful neighbour across the road who is very Italian, and so very kind.
   He grows a beautiful garden in the summer, and last year he gave us a pile of cucumbers and tomatoes. I pickled the cucumbers, and made a bit of tomato sauce out of some of the larger tomatoes, but he gave me a delicious recipe (a rough idea in a conversation, really) for a way to use the cherry tomatoes.
   Here it is, the Fresh Italian salad, compliments of my neighbour....sort of. 

Fresh Italian Salad

Ingredients:

• 2 Cups cherry tomatoes, cut in half
• 1 pepper, any colour, cut into 1 inch pieces
• 1 Small onion, diced
• 1 Cucumber, cut however you want
• 3 Tbsp (approx.) fresh basil, finely chopped, or 1 tbsp dried
• 4 cloves garlic, crushed and chopped
• 1 Tbsp olive oil
• Salt & pepper to taste

Method: 

1. Put all the ingredients in a bowl, and stir to get all the flavours mixed in nicely.

   You can eat this as a side salad, put it on meat, or even on toast (garlic toast is even better!). 

   Well, I'm off! If you're going to any sort of get-together this weekend, bring this! For realz, it's super simple, and everybody will love it (and therefore love you)! ;) 
   Happy weekend to one and all! xo

   I don't mean yesterday as in the song by the Beatles, but our actual day yesterday.
   I had a whole other post written, but I had to talk about yesterday!
   Let me tell you about it...
   We had planned to go to the beach for the entire day, but when we woke up it was semi-cloudy, but more than that, it was really cool out! :(  So, as I packed up lunches and snacks, Adam surfed the web looking for indoor things to do, or as least something that didn't involve as much water as the beach! 
   Well, anything indoors costs a lot of moo-la, so we weren't sure what to do. 
   Caleb was hearing our conversations, and was looking concerned because we had already said the day before that we were going to the beach. 
   Finally, after trying to find a new place to go, we just decided on 2 familiar (and free!) places to go. We gave the kids the choice in the end: Madoc park and splash pad, or Peterborough zoo and splash pad? 
   They all picked the zoo.   

   So, off we went, we got to the zoo at a good time and (with our sweaters on!), headed into the zoo. You have to walk past the splash pad when going into the Peterborough (Riverside) Zoo, and usually Caleb will start right away with "Caleb needs to go to splash pad!!!", but he walked in happily, and didn't even mention the splash pad. My husband and I looked at each other like, "oh, wow!".
   The day went by really well. Caleb (and the girls) got along, they were considerate of other people, and were being good listeners. 
   At the zoo there is a little train you can ride, but when we got to the train the line was looooong (2 train rides long, and each ride is 10 minutes, so we knew we would be waiting a while). But, I told Caleb, "we are going to have to wait our turn, there are a lot of people. Would you like a snack?" Caleb replies..."Um, Caleb will like to ride the train?" (it was a question). I repeated, "Yup, we'll ride the train, we just need to wait first". He looked past me at the long line and said, "Caleb will have a snack". Again, my husband and I looked at each other like, "Whaaaaa?".    

   We were seeing how far Caleb has come in a place that had once been a semi-nightmare to take him to! 
   He used to run away, try to climb into the animal enclosures, have a major meltdown because we weren't doing the splash pad first, he would scream and be upset at every seagull we would see, he would be upset if we couldn't see every animal in it's enclosure (the animals didn't get the memo that autistic kids expect to see every animal that the sign by the enclosure says should be there!).  He was honestly doing so amazing. Not even just for a special needs kid, he was doing amazing for a typical kid!!!   

   As we were nearing the end of seeing the animals, Caleb kept saying (with increasing anxiety), "Caleb will see the parrots!". I had noticed an enclosure next to the spider monkeys that had a sign saying there was a parrot, but the enclosure looked empty, so I had assumed it was an old sign. But we had seen a fake parrot on the little train ride, so I thought maybe Caleb was talking about that, so I kept saying to him, "we saw the pretend parrot on the train ride, remember?", and he would say, "Caleb will see the real parrots!". Anyway, he calmed down about it, and we back-tracked a little to see some of our favourite animals (including the spider monkeys). As we were walking away from the monkey enclosure, we heard this terrible noise behind us, like a cat being run over! Caleb's face lights up and he screams, "It's a paaarrrrrot!!!!!". 
   Someone close by to the enclosure we had just walked away from says, "Yup, it's right there". And there it was; a beautiful, full of colour parrot! We had missed it twice, but at the last minute it's crazy screech got our attention. I look at my husband (again), with a "what the heck?" look. I said to Caleb, "You are so smart...you were right about the parrot, thank you for not getting upset with me for not believing there was a real parrot".
   He didn't care about my apology, he was enraptured with the parrot, who said, "hello", which thrilled Caleb to his core!    

   Adam and the girls left Caleb and I at the parrot while they were going to go to the car to get bathing suits and towels for the splash pad. A while later, they came back with no bag of splash pad stuff, and Adam tells me, "I asked the girls if they would rather the splash pad or the park (which is really 4 separate huge and fun parks), and they choose the parks. He had asked them to make the choice because it was getting late (and more chilly), and we were't sure we could do both the parks and splash pad as we were all getting hungry and tired.
   So, we said goodbye to the parrot, and walked towards the park. Caleb was very happy at the park (the last time I let him play at the park a few years ago he got so many stink eyes from more kids and adults than I care to recall), and was enjoying himself. Until I said, "o.k, 5 more minutes than we're going in our car".    

   Caleb came over to us with tears welling in his eyes, and said, "Caleb will go to the splash pad...?". Adam explained that he girls had decided that we would do the park instead, and Caleb just walked away, going back to the park.
   A few seconds later I can see Caleb sitting at the bottom of a slide, biting his lip, trying so hard not to cry. So, we call him over, and he says, "Caleb is so very wants to go to the splash pad...", and he starts crying. 
   For the millionth time that day, Adam and I look at each other knowing what this situation would have looked like even last summer. A full-on meltdown, screaming and flailing for lack of understanding that plans can change. He was being so sweet though, trying his best to understand the situation. 
   So, Adam asks the girls, "Caleb really wants to go to the splash pad, can we go there now that we've played at the park?. The girls (of course) had no problem going to the splash pad, and when Caleb saw them saying yes, his little face just lit up, and he wiped away his tears, and said, "Caleb is so very going to the splash pad!!!"   

    So, we hit-up the splash pad which was empty by this point. It was 6:30pm, getting a lot cooler, but the kids (and especially Caleb) had so much fun. It was good to see him enjoying it so much, knowing how hard he had controlled himself when he thought he wasn't going to have a chance to go. 
   So, we finished up at the zoo, telling the kids how pleased we were with them for being so well behaved. 
   Now we just needed a place to eat our picnic dinner. We wanted a change of scenery from the zoo, so Adam decided it would be nice to drive down to the waterfront for a picnic. 
   Well, we drive downtown, and there are a ton of cars, people walking around, there is clearly something going on. So, we find a parking spot, grab our food, and head to the waterfront. As we get closer (walking in a large group of people), we ask someone, "what's going on?". He tells us that Colin James is there tonight for one of Peterborough free summer concerts. 
  Um, what? We were so excited! We walked towards the stage, and picked a spot to sit (we looked a little strange because everyone had brought chairs, and we were sitting in the grass among them!), but we were happy! They were handing out free juice boxes, which added to the fun for the kids (who never get juice boxes!), and we settled in for whatever amount of time we thought we could last. The kids were getting tired (so was I!), we were all pretty dang cold, and we just thought we would stay open to the idea that we might have to leave quickly if the kids suddenly became that coo-coo crazy crying tired that kids are so good at!
   The show started at 8pm, there was 12,000 in attendance, and we stayed until the end at 10pm-ish! Oh man, the kids danced, Caleb sang along to some of the songs he knew from our iTunes playlists, and everyone forgot how cold they were! 
   I honestly couldn't believe the day we had, Especially from Caleb's point of view!
   It was literally a day of, "I dunno, whadda you wanna do?", and compromise. The crazy loud concert at the end of the day, Caleb seeing people eat popcorn (and saying every 10 minutes, "Caleb will eat popcorn?", and me saying, "Um, nope"), but getting over it and enjoying himself! 
   We thought, what a great day, look how amazing we are!....But, as is generally the case when you start to pat yourself on the back, something goes really wrong!  

   We stand up to go, and Adam reaches into his pocket for our car key (which, by the way, is not on a key chain because it's one of those automatic lock thingies, but the part where you can attach it to a key chain is broken, so it's just a lonely key with the black top), and it's gone! GONE! There was a hole in his pocket!!! The other people at the concert had quickly packed up and left, so we were basically alone, in a dark field, with no flashlight, and no key!!!
   We stayed calm, the kids and I stopped to pray that God would help us find our key...or at least someone who would give us money for a hotel because both mine and Adam's wallets were in our van! 
   The kids (and especially Caleb) kept their cool, even though they were very tired, now realizing they were cold, and starting to understand that without the key, we were stuck.
   Adam re-traced his steps from his last trip to the van to get our camera (because remember we thought we were going to just have a picnic and ended up at a free concert!!!), and the kids and I held hands in a line and "dragged" the field  looking for the key. 
   A police officer saw us, and came over to help (with her flashlight!), and we continued our search. By 11pm, there is still no key, and I have literally been looking at the ground with the kids for an hour. Suddenly, someone says, "someone found a key!". I look up and realize there are at least 7 police officers with their flashlights looking for the key with us (I literally didn't know they were there!), and one of them says again, "She says, someone found a key", pointing at an event staff member. And there standing with an officer is an event staff member who is waiting to take us backstage where they have the key. We tried not to get our hopes up, incase it's not our key, but we're feeling excited about going behind the stage to the trailer/musician area! 
   So, we go backstage where there is some conversation about who took our key where, but as we stood there we see the guitarist and keyboardist from the band, who smiled at us (we hid how excited we were). Caleb goes right up to the keyboardist and says, "the police have our van key!", and the keyboardist just laughs a little at him. 
   Not only had Caleb patiently wandered through a field in the dark in the cold (kindly reminding us how hungry he was), but he was really was absorbing and understanding what was happening (well, minus talking to a stranger who happened to be in Colin James' band!). He had stayed calm, had been helpful, and had a crazy amazing day!    

   Seriously, what a day! What a day!!! 
   Caleb showed us his resilience, his ability to adapt and change, and his improvements in communication. He showed us how he can change based on other people in his family, how he can go to a loud, overly crowded gathering and stay sane, and how he can go with the flow when our key goes missing and we're wandering (and shivering) through a field looking for it!
   Special needs kids or not, moments in raising kids can feel like they will last forever. The terrible two's, potty training, sleeping through the night. These things change, they don't stay the same forever. 
   The same is true for kids with special needs. It may seem hopeless, but they are changing, growing, improving. Keep working on them, but loving them for who they are & where they are.    

   Still here! :)  
   The only thing I have to say about these bars is....yu-uumm! They are really tasty, and you can customize them with what things you might have on hand. I tend to make them as a last minute type thing because they are easy to pull together. They do need sufficient cooling time though, so if you're going to make them last minute, be prepared to bring them to wherever you're going with them still in the baking dish.    

Peanut Butter Bars

Ingredients: 

• 1 Tsp Baking powder
• 1 Cup brown sugar
  
• 2 Eggs
• 1 Tsp Vanilla
• 1 1/2 Cups peanut butter, crunchy or smooth
  
• 1 ⅓ Cup add-ins. You can use chopped pecans, walnuts, almonds, or more peanuts. I like to use ⅔ cup chopped nuts, and ⅔ cup chocolate chips, M&M's, or Skor Bits. You could also use white chocolate chips or butterscotch chips. For this batch I used chopped pecans and semi-sweet chocolate chips.

Method: 

1. Preheat oven to 350 Degrees. Lightly grease an 8x8 baking dish, and line with parchment, leaving overhang as handles for later. 
2. Whisk the brown sugar and baking powder in a bowl until blended
3. Using an electric hand mixer, add the eggs, vanilla and peanut butter. Cream all ingredients together well.
4. Stir in the add-ins, then pour/scrape into the prepared baking dish.
5. Bake for about 25 minutes until top has browned and edges are crisp. 
6. Let cool for 15 minutes or so before pulling the squares out of the pan, using your parchment handles. Let the bars cool fully sitting on their parchment, on a cooling rack. 
   
7. Once cooled, lift squares onto a cutting board, and cut into squares. 

   Well, Wednesday people, have a good day! I am feeling a bit edgy/grumpy at the moment, but I'm hoping to get out with the kids and make it a good one. I haven't had my coffee yet, so maybe I'll better after that? Fingers crossed! :)  

   Does anyone besides me find themselves watching endless Ellen clips of "What's wrong with these photos?" photos, or those funny/sometimes inappropriate e-cards (find more here), or Pinterest fails? I hope I'm not the only one, and if I am, well, hot dog, I'm just special! :)  
   Anywhoooo, today I thought I would share some things that make me laugh and laugh (and laugh some more!). What else can one do besides laugh when they are planning a trip but are held up by passports? Nothing, that's what! Nothing else but laugh. 
   Raising a family calls for some serious laughter too (ironically, if you want to stay sane you need to laugh...?)
   Please take the time to look through and give yourself a good laugh, it is seriously good for you! Everyone needs a good laugh!

   If you like dancing even a tiny bit (or maybe just laughing at children...), than this sweet little dear will make you laugh so hard! Bless her heart she is just in way over her head! 

   I am a bit particular about grammar (and it being used correctly!), so this e-card was written for me!  :) 

   ....Basically....

   Hahahaha...oh man...

   I would like to own this shirt. You can if you want! Buy it here! 

   The best. 

   Some epic photo fails...

   I love the cake fails where what they are told (probably over the phone) to put on the cake, they just write out word for word onto the cake....brilliant...

  Happey Berthdaey Beky (insert the "c")! :)  (sprinkels, sprinkles, sprinkels) 

   Well, if you aren't laughing about these fantastic things, you're a grumpy old fart. Seriously, you are. 
   If you did laugh, and have time for a smidge more laughter, watch any of these clips from Ellen and "what's wrong with these photos?" photos. 
   O.k, one last picture....she's so sweet, and kids spelling errors are often so very funny, but this one...oh boy...you can find more fantastic kids spelling errors here.

   O.k, I hope you had a good laugh! Or at least a little laugh.....a smile? 
   Laugh a little, pass it on!  

   Well, it's Monday and here I am! Not on holiday--yet! We're hoping we'll be off soon though...anyway, whether or not we go where we had planned, there is still lots-o summer fun to be had, and we shall have it! 
   Moving onto taco salad. I realize for this to actually be a taco salad it should have corn chips or something on it, but when I'm eating clean/paleo there are no corn chips that fit into my life. Also, "sans" means "without" in french, just fyi.  :) 
   But really, this salad is so tasty, and can stand on it's own, without it's cool friend the corn chip. That being said, if you eat corn chips, then crush some and add them to the top of this! Do what you want! 
   The idea is basically that this salad is what you might have in a taco, only deconstructed! Plus, when you eat a "taco" this way, you are upping the veggies, which is always good. 

Taco Salad (sans taco)

Ingredients:

• 1 medium sized onion, diced
• 1 lb ground beef, pork, turkey or chicken
• 227G container of mushrooms, washed and sliced
• 1 tomato, diced (or 1 cup of salsa)
• 2 Tbsp Franks Original Hot Sauce (only if you're using a plain tomato, not if you're using salsa)
• 2 Tbsp Chili Powder 
• 1 Tbsp Garlic powder
• 1 Tbsp Paprika

• Romaine, wash and chopped. As a meal, you'll want 1 cup of salad per child that will eat, and 2-3 cups salad per adult.
• Toppings: Tomato, cucumber, peppers, hot banana rings, avocado, green onions, whatever you would like! For the non-paleo person toppings can include: crushed corn chips, beans, sour cream and cheese.

Method:

1. First make your avocado dressing, if you're using it (it's simple and yummy!). The recipe is right here. 
2. In a medium-sized skillet over medium heat, sauté the onion with a tablespoon or two of coconut oil or olive oil for a few minutes, until browning and translucent.
3. Add the mushrooms and allow them to brown and soften. Give them 5 minutes or so.
4. Add the ground meat along with the seasonings to the skillet. Brown the meat, breaking up bigger pieces, until meat is cooked through.
5. Add the chopped tomato and Frank's (or salsa), and allow them to simmer and get cozy with the with meat mixture and pick up all the nice flavours.
6. Divide the salad among bowls or plates. You can add your toppings now, or after your meat mixture is on, whichever you prefer! You can also add the dressing now or wait until you can also put it over the meat.
   
7. Spoon the meat mixture over each salad, and finish it up by adding dressing and toppings (if you haven't already). 
8. Devour! :)  

   I love salad. I know a lot of people don't, but I do! In our house we don't eat a lot of cooked veggies; our stand-by veg is always salad. Now, that can bite us in the behind when we run out of lettuce (or all the fresh toppings), and we're all staring with distain at steamed broccoli on our plates, but it is what it is! We'll eat the cooked veg, but our first and truest vegetable love is salad. Just thought I'd share that. 
   Happy Monday!  

   My kids love freezies and popsicles. I think most kids do. We rarely buy popsicles though because we live too far away from where we get our groceries, and they would melt before we ever got them home! So, for 99 cents I got a popsicles mould, and we've been having a great time making our own popsicles. I'll be posting a few this summer so a look out! 

Ingredients:

• 1/2 Ripe avocado
• 2 Heaping tbsp cocoa
• 2 Tbsp maple syrup
• 1/2 Tsp lemon juice
• Almost 1 cup almond milk (more or less depending on how creamy you want it/how good your blender works!)
• Dash of cinnamon

Method:

1. Throw everything in the blender (or food processor) and whip it up, scraping down sides as needed.
2. Pour into popsicle moulds, and put into the freezer until solid. 
3. Enjoy!

   O.k. folks, I'm signing off for another week! The hubby starts his holiday next week, and I'm not 100% sure yet where we're going (or if we can go where we were planning!), but all I do know is that for the next 2 weeks my posts may be a bit sporadic! If you click the RSS Feed option (up there along the right hand bar) it'll alert you when I have posted, but truthfully, I don't know how it works on a PC! On our Mac we needed to download a (free) RSS Notifier, and when I click on it, it will tell me who has posted on the blogs that I've subscribed to their feeds. Just fyi! 
   So, that's all, and have a good weekend!  

   Those with autism have different things that can trigger what I call a "meltdown". A "meltdown" is a temper tantrum of epic proportions.
   Imagine the temper tantrum of a 2 year old. Now multiply the volume by 100, and the strength of the flailing giver of the tantrum by 100, and the stress caused by the tantrum by 100. Now imagine that instead of it being the two year old who is having a tantrum because of (perhaps) a firm "no", or a snack that is not approved of, or being in trouble for biting, you have a child who is "melting"....and you actually have no idea why! 
   For years and years we were surprised by Caleb and his meltdowns. We weren't surprised he was having them, we expected them with his autism, but what surprised us was what they were showing up for. It wasn't that he was scared of something (though he is scared of things and will run away screaming sometimes!), it was things that actually seemed to bother or hurt him somehow.
   We started taking note of what was bothering him, half to avoid some of the situations, and half to desensitize him to the triggers. 
   Some of the things that bothered him back in the day were shoes and boots, socks and underwear, fleece and silk, going to church and pre-school, holding hands, movies being stopped at any point before they were finished (completely and fully, including the credits and any possible thing that might have followed the credits), going for walks (mainly just having to turn around and go back from the direction we had come from), getting his hair cut, brushing his teeth, and bathing. 
   His new things he has a hard time tolerating are being touched gently (especially on the head) without him seeing your hand coming (and as an add-on, he hates playing tag because of this), he still doesn't like if he can't watch a movie until the bitter end (though he will allow it to be stopped throughout for different reasons-as long as he is the one who can turn off the t.v.), having to turn the van around (if we forgot something or got lost), and having to tell him he's wrong about something he is sooooo very certain of. For example, a tomato being a fruit, and not a veggie, the fact that there are fish called herring, and a bird called a heron that eats fish (he thinks I'm telling him a heron eats a heron), and that the seasons really do go in a particular order, no matter how confusing Canadian seasons are! He also won't let you turn off his night light, and if you do turn it off, he will turn it back on, then off, then on, then off again. Sheesh.

   Some of his triggers (from the past and now) are related to his senses and his sensory overloads, and some are possibly because of things Caleb can't express verbally, and gets frustrated about.
   My thing about autism and triggers is that some need to be left alone (aka-ignored or risk mega meltdown!), and others really do need to be worked on until the person with autism can function. For instance, getting Caleb to come to church, and get to school without screaming and having a meltdown was important for our family and for him. Making him not turn his night light on and off and on and off, I don't really care about! It's not a life changer. 
   He used to have a meltdown almost every time we went to the grocery store, I'm still not 100% sure what was triggering those meltdowns, but I knew he needed to learn that the grocery store wasn't so scary. I started fixing that problem with Skittles (I actually worked on a lot of his problems with Skittles!). I never said, "You're being so good, here's a Skittle, I would just nonchalantly pass one to him. We'd get to the store, I'd hand him a Skittle. We'd get a cart, I'd hand him a Skittle. I'd put him in the cart...I think you get the idea. As soon as he would start a meltdown (and, by the way, if you are trying to desensitize a child to something that causes them to react negatively, just tell yourself it will take a while, it will be stressful, but you CAN do it!), I would stop with the Skittles, and carry on at the grocery store, screaming child in tow. I wouldn't talk to him really, I would just carry on. No more Skittles. Honestly, I don't know how long it took exactly to get him to a point where he would do groceries with me, it took a while, but he can do it now. I don't even have to give him any candy! I know right, mother of the year (sarcasm people). 

   I'm not sure what exactly I'm trying to say except that I just wanted to give you another glimpse at Caleb and his life so far. How far he's come, how much he's accomplished, and how difficult and different his life has been from an average 10 year old. Autism has made his life tricky, and challenging, but also made him strong and resilient. 
   We all have triggers, things that set us off and irritate us. Maybe we should keep Skittles in our pockets for ourselves to teach us to associate good things with the bad situation. Just kidding. But maybe we can learn something from Caleb about overcoming our fears, the things that make us pull back, and want to "meltdown". 
   Push on, challenge yourself! You don't know how strong you can be until you push and see how strong you are! Don't assume that because something has scared you, or you failed at something, that you can't try to do it again. Geepers, if Caleb felt like that, he wouldn't go to school or church, would still be bare feet and underwear-less. He wouldn't brush his teeth or take a bath, and he wouldn't be the amazing young man he is today!